Don't be cheap!

If a loved one dies... you must help out and help with the burial expenses, otherwise when we come back as zombies we WILL come after you first. We will have no mercy.

Zombie Fashion III

Not because we are zombies it means that we are not into fashion. That is a myth. Zombies love to look cool and wear the latest and trendiest. We keep it real.

Zombies in NY!!!

It is unconfirmed, but I heard that zombies are trying to invade NY. Incredible!. I am waiting for confirmation...I will keep you posted.

Travel Advisory: Zimbabwe and the Sperm Hunters

Watch it!
It has been all over the news : in Zimbabwe a crime spree is happening as we speak. A bunch of women are into the business of stealing...gasp...SPERM from men and -I heard- zombies. They collect this poor guy's sperm and sell it in the black market where is converted into "juju" potion (great for your mojo).

Zimbabwe's Tourism Office has seen an increase in male's travel to the Country. I am going next week.

Zombies are Prettier than Cats

And here is proof of that. If I find THIS when I am out and about I will pee my pants. Horrible creatures I can tell you that much.

Would Zombies Eat The Pope's Brain?

Yeah right... I don't think so. It looks like a trap to me.

Do Zombies Eat Beef?

Well...it depends...if the cow is Sacred AND a Zombie Cow... then we might think about it, otherwise nope. We watch what we eat.

From The Book of Knowledge IX

Depression is just anger without enthusiasm.

Justice!

Finally....a group of zombies decided to take action and tried to convince Justin Bieber to become a zombie. They used the Mexican-police approach. They failed, but you can't blame them for trying.

Zombies Like Dark Shadows!

I used to watch it back in the 60's...then I watched the re-do in the 80's...now my good friend Tim Burton is bringing it to the big screen. I am starting the line-up outside the cinema today (my reasons are valid not like Hunger Games' stupid followers)...and I don't need to leave the line as I don't pee -one good thing about not having kidneys-.

I Got My iPad 3!!!!

After waiting for three days in a line at the Apple store...finally the dream became a reality. I have an iPad 3. Somehow I kind of remember doing the same thing a year ago for ask iPad 2...don't know why.

Hunger Games are NOT Battle Royale!

Please don't get all confused. Battle Royale is a great Japanese film by Kinji Fukasaku... all bloody, gory and stuff that zombies love. Great ending... when I went to see it at the movie theatre you were given a plastic poncho to protect you from the blood bath. Hunger Games is a stupid imitation, lame, and Disney-Harry Potter like...just sad. If you are a real zombie, please avoid the torture. Watching that really hurts.

Do Zombies Like Hunger Games?

No!
For us eating is nothing to joke about, and not a game. That is a stupid idea. If I am hungry I don't want to play "hunger games".... all I want is to eat. We like Eating Games.

Zombie's Uses for an iPod

iPods are stupid. Zombies dislike iPods. We hate music, we dislike photos...and don't even get me started with "apps". The only way I can find an iPod useful is if it helps me to open a beer bottle.

Do Zombies Like Zombies?

No!
Zombies do not like zombies. We like ourselves. So you understand better I posted in 3D.

I Need to Celebrate!

Yes, today I feel like celebrating for no reason at all. I am in a good mood, therefore I am going out, all dressed-up in search of fresh delicious brains.

Are There Any Monsters Scarier than a Zombie?

YES. One of the worst is JOSEPH KONY. We all must stop him. A zombie is a lamb next to him. Help to stop him, spread the word.

Stupid Ideas CXXII

If I am spending a bundle to buy a Mercedes...the idea is to show everybody that I am better and wealthier than they are. Why in the planet would I want to hide my wealth with this stupid technology. If I drive a fancy car is because I do want to be seen (and a spirit booster for poor people...I like to give hope to those lonely souls...I am such a good zombie)

What to do With My iPad 2?

Now that Apple has released the new iPad 3... this is a great idea on what to do with your iPad 2. Remember that zombies are very sustainable.

Zombie's Mantra MCI

I am The Maker of Rules, dealing with fools.

One of Zombie's Favourite Drinks

For sure "Dead Man's Toe" a drink you can only get in an specific pub in Alaska. They place this toe (an actual toe from somebody...) inside the glass and then they serve you your drink. You enjoy the drink but must return the toe. It gives some special flavouring to your drink. I like it.

From The Book of Knowledge CVI

If you think that the best way to reach a man's heart is by his stomach, you should know that you probably are aiming too low.

Jesus on The Run...

Nowadays EVERYBODY is in a hurry...really.