A different approach to mass transit

In the Mentougou district, Beijing they will son have this innovative way of moving zombies -and there are lots of them there-. This 6 metre high train was developed by the Shenzhen Hashi Future Parking Equipment (SHFPE..I know) and will allow cars to travel beneath while in the upper level 1,400 souls enjoy the ride. The idea is to reduce pollution and reduce traffic by 30% also.

This new train system will travel at 60 km/hr and will be equipped with sensors and scanners that will prevent any accidents as it warns with light and sound if a car is getting too close to the train's walls. The investment is 500 yuan for 40 km of track, which is 10% of the cost of building a subway in China. For those who don't have any yuan... 1 yuan equals $ 1.5 US.

A long video but worthwhile to watch.

The Day I Started Drinking

With that incentive, who doesn't?

Dobleces

Fake Zombies

Every year, for 5 years now, in all major cities in the world misguided zombies try to dress-up as...zombies!
They gather in different places and walk all over downtown, hundreds of them, with tons of make-up trying to glorify the zombie presence in this lonely planet.

We are here, people... we are falling apart, but it just does not show. Not all zombies are pale, some like to sun-bathe. Ah!...and most importantly, we don't carry weapons. Where in hell these misguided souls decided to put together weapons and zombies is beyond me.

Some of these items where quite aggressive... again...most zombies are good souls...

And something else... some female look-alike zombies are dressed up as brides. Those are not zombies, those are called crazies.

Monkey Business 1

One too many

For most zombies one is too many. It is a known fact that zombies love to cruise alone. Defective zombies who try to comply with society's rules marry. There is pain just there, but some believe that one is not good enough and have, well.. more than one wife, trying to follow the extraordinary example of Don Francisco Villa, Mexican Revolution Hero who had 18 women...18!

Of all those women, Luz Corral was the Alpha Female. She is the one who is recognized as the official wife. She was also known as La Guera (The Blond One) and she was in charge of looking after Villa's 12 kids (official number) and to distribute chores.

I don't know about you.. but one is plenty, thank you very much.

Zombies love LEGO

ZOMBIE'S QUOTES- MARK TWAIN

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.


I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
 
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.




It is easier to stay out than get out.

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.


Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it.


Nadie se desembaraza de un hábito o de un vicio tirándolo por la ventana: hay que sacarlo por la escalera, peldaño a peldaño.
 
Un hombre con una idea nueva es un loco, hasta que la idea triunfa.
 
El paraiso lo prefiero por el clima; el infierno por la compañía.
 
La educación es la defensa organizada de los adultos  contra los jóvenes.

Strange Zombie Behaviour II

Zombies are superstitious. We believe in any crazy idea that other zombies believe. Between many things we believe in, one is that we MUST pick up any coin from the ground as we consider that to be good luck. It doesn't matter what denomination or country the coin comes from. One must not leave it on the ground, as, first of all... it's... well.. money! and then... it is bad luck not to pick it up. Your money will end lost in the streets if you don't do so.
Ah!...and you are not supposed to spend that coin either... Believe it or not.

Trapped Nature

Zombies watch what they eat

Undocumented popular knowledge claims that zombies eat human meat and that brains are our favourite dessert. Well... you are all wrong. We watch what we eat. Some zombies are very picky and only eat organic. Some are lacto-intolerant and others love hot-dogs. Yes, I know... hotdogs?...really?

Well, yes. I have never claimed that zombies are very smart, so eating hot-dogs is not a surprise at all. There are many urban stories on what this famous fast food contain. It is said that "all beef" hot-dogs are made with "all natural casing" which in plain English means "all-natural pig intestine casing".

But who eats what is not my business. What I want to share with you is that there is such thing as a JAPADOG. A Japadog is an interesting variation of the popular fast food and you can find it on Robson Street, between Richards and Seymour in cosmopolitan Vancouver BC. This ever popular cart, whit lineups that can go as long as the block is, specializes in what they call "Japanese-style hot-dogs"

People from all over the world make sure that, if visiting Vancouver, they must enjoy a Japadog. On the little cart there are pictures of movie stars (not Justin Bieber), politicians and important well-known people -not me-.

The japadog menu includes a Yakiniku, a hot-dog made with a bun made of rice and stuffed with a wiener and slathered with a meat sauce. Others have teriyaki sauce, seaweed, japanese mayo and jalapeno. Other has plum sauce, bonito flakes and fried cabbage.

Why people line-up for this is beyond me. I have tried them and they taste, well... like hot-dogs -to me-.

That makes me think. If I go to, let's say, Italy I imagine I will find "Italian-dogs" with pesto and pasta and if I go to Argentina I will find the "Argentino-dog" with... I don't know... any ideas?

I, for one, am thinking on opening a "Zombie-dog" cart, based on Tim Burton's character Frankenweenie.

Eye of The Beholder III

A typical example of  a zombie  seen by his own eye.

Eye of The Beholder II